Goodbye, Alfie

Alfie's gear was packed, feeding instructions written down, and Alfie himself received a thorough grooming.  Monday came, our goodbyes were said, one last picture was taken...

...and I handed over his leash for the last time.  I did better than I thought I would; I managed not to break down and cry or do anything embarrassing.

That came later.

I had to run to the store for something and as I pulled up to the traffic light the random thought broke into my consciousness:  This was the first intersection where we crossed 4 lanes of traffic together.  I remembered Alfie's aplomb despite his young age and the busy traffic, as well as his polite tolerance of a toddler who patted his head as she walked the opposite direction with her mama.  Sure enough, tears start to well up.

OK, OK, calm down, I think as the light turns green and I head for the store...impossible not to remember, though, the many times I'd been here with Alfie:  how well he knew his "lefts" and "rights" (better than many people, actually)...how much he enjoyed finding the counter...how impressed people were that I could drop his leash anywhere and he'd relax into an automatic down/stay, always smiling at what I'm sure he took to be his adoring public.  No point in fighting the tears any more, so I just let them come! 

Somehow I manage to get my errand done, but the scene replays daily in various forms no matter where I go:

This is the store where some kids came racing around the corner and ran right into us...
We went and saw a movie with Alfie at that theater...
I remember working those steep  stairs there...
That's where we rode the bus the first time...

...And on and on.  At some stores, the staff even miss Alfie and ask about him!  I went to pick up a prescription and was greeted with, "Where is your dog?"  He's become, in some ways, almost a part of me. 

But there's a sweetness to the sorrow, too:  If he already means this much to me, imagine what he'll mean to his partner as a fully trained guide.  That's what it's always been about, I remind myself.

Larry promised to update me on Alfie, and I'll post any news I get to this blog just in case there are still any interested readers out there!  My own life is opening a new chapter and I'm excited about what it may hold...who knows, maybe I'll continue blogging in some form later on, once I get settled.  This blog has been a fun journey for me, and seems to have taken on a life of its own!

I wake up to an oddly silent room in the mornings now.  No crate beside my bed, no questioning Grrr? coming from inside.  I used to flop over and unlatch the door with one hand, and he'd come out sleepily, yawning and leaning into me with a sort of Wawagaaa and a big whiskery kiss on the face. 

Now there's just a crate-sized square of mashed-down carpet at my bedside...and, forever, an imprint on my heart.

Love you, Alfie.

It's All Happening So Quickly

So, as I announced yesterday, our family's moving to Missouri and since our school happens to be Guide Dogs of Texas...Alfie's going to leave us and stay with another raiser until advanced training.  I spoke with my supervisor, Larry, on the phone today and it looks like things are arranged for Alfie to be picked up Monday.  BIG SIGH...

But today, I don't really want to dwell on goodbyes.  I'm excited to hear that GDTx' first pick of raiser for Alfie said yes!  I don't believe I've met her, and don't even know her name.  What I do know is that she's not only raised puppies successfully for GDTx (before I started volunteering there), she's also an experienced animal trainer of another type:  she used to work with marine mammals at Sea World.  Sounds like a great place for Alfie, don't you think? 

From dolphins to doodles!

 Things have been incredibly hectic around the house.  One of the reasons I went ahead and arranged for Alfie to leave so soon is that he's been picking up on all the stress and upheaval as we pack, meet with realtors, etc...nothing severe, but he's been having some tummy issues.  Poor guy, he has no way to know or understand what's going on!  That tends to make me feel guilty, which he also is probably picking up on...a vicious cycle.  Also, although he's been going places with me, I obviously haven't had the time to devote to his obedience work and training like I normally would. 

I was clearing out a cupboard today and prepping it for refinishing (hence the dust on the floor)...came back and guess who was inside?

They'll have trouble selling this house:  Severe doodle infestation under the sink!

So many fun Alfie memories.  Two stand out today:

One of the most entertaining (and useful) things about this guy is how naturally good he is at finding things.  When we misplace something, he can often find it for us.  Wednesday night Charissa was getting him ready for our walk and noticed his leash wasn't hanging on its peg.  After asking Alfie where it was, she thought of looking in the garage and opened the garage door.  Alfie darted in, threaded his way through piles of boxes (you can definitely tell we're packing!)... then he turned around and pointed his nose up to the top of a particular stack...the leash was way at the top of a stack of 4 boxes.  There was no way for him to see it -- I'm guessing he either smelled it, or remembered its being left there earlier.  I'm sure it would've taken us forever to think of looking there if it hadn't been for Alfie's help! 

Alfie can also get very excited during play and will occasionally chase, and catch, his tail.  I used to worry that that meant he was too high strung...but as time went on I realized that he seems to be mainly doing it to make us laugh!  I imagine he'll outgrow that eventually.  I've always wanted to catch it on video but when I get the camera out he stops!  Go figure.

Now for the BIG News

As some might remember, Alfie's scheduled evaluation date is January 2011 -- the same time as Bob, Celia, Petey, and Piper.  So "goodbye" was always just around the corner.  But recent events have accelerated that timeline...our family is moving out of state early next month, and so Alfie will be moving to another raiser home for his last couple of months as a puppy-in-training.

Yes, we're looking forward to our new venture for many reasons!  I'm so proud of my husband Tim, who is going to be focusing on finishing grad school (the main reason behind our move).  The whole family is excited that we'll be living in Springfield, MO -- near my Mom, my brother's family, a dear aunt and uncle, plus other friends!  The only hard part, of course, is saying goodbyes:  to family here in Texas, to our wonderful church family, to friends, to GDTx...and, yes, to one special doodle.

It's tough for me to let go of Alfie:  somehow, with each successive guide dog pup I've raised, it seems that the bond has been deeper.  Alfie has such an uncanny way of "reading" me, and quite a flair for 2-way communication!  Aside from my emotions, however, it's also hard to turn over a "project" in which I am so invested.  Maybe that's just my perfectionist/controlling streak...I'm sure that another raiser will do their best, just as I have, and Alfie will turn out fine.

The GDTx team is working on selecting Alfie's new raiser home, and I'll keep you updated!  I don't yet know exactly when he'll leave.  But until he does, I thought it would be fun to do a few posts on what I'll remember most about my time with Alfie.  Stay tuned!